22 February 2009

The Men in Green, Who Are Not Martians, But Leprechauns!


The Men in Green spoken of in the title are not aliens or Oompa Loompas, but the Boston Celitics. They stormed the Energy Solutions Arena in Salt Lake City, UT on Thursday, but unfortunately left their luck on the aeroplane. I would know, I was there. The Jazz got the better half of us this time, including Garnett. But, the game was still an absolute blast and a half. We had dinner at the Gateway beforehand and received mixed greetings- pleasantries from the Celitcs fans and scowls from the Jazz fans. It reminded me of the time I went to a Red Sox game at Yankee Stadium. Oh wait, no it doesn't, no one gave us pleasantries there- they hated us! We thought our tickets (to the Celtics/Jazz game) would be decent ($16 face value!) and in fact, if we had the eyes of an eagle, a desire for a beer stench, and we wanted solitude, they would have been perfect! Absolutely no complaints! As it were, none of us have eagle eyes, none of us desire the stench of beer (why doesn't anyone sell flowers at Jazz games? I love the smell of fresh cut flowers!), although the solitude wasn't that bad. I went with a pretty cordial cohort of coeds, most of whom were from Boston or married to someone from Boston. It was my first Jazz game and my second Celtics game, and I would have to say I enjoyed it entirely. Probably the highlight was seeing my friend show up in a John Deere shirt because he didn't have any Celitcs gear. Go C's!

15 February 2009

The International Cinema

If you are a BYU student, and if you like movies, and if you speak another language, and if you are short on cash and you don't know what ANWR stands for, then boy do I have the place for you! The International Cinema! The International Cinema is self-described as "The world's largest and longest-running university foreign film program," which I personally find a little dubious. I mean, how can they make the claim that they are the 'largest foreign film program' in the world? What defines largest? Does that refer to the amount of movies shown or the number of personnel invovled in the production? And then there is the question of what defines a foreign film? Morgan Freeman is African-American; does that make Batman: The Dark Knight a foreign film? Adding to its case, there was a scene from Hong Kong, plus no one really knows where Gotham City is, so it could technically be qualified as 'foreign' to every country. And then you have to consider that the majority of films are made in the US, so every other country has a leg up on us in terms of sheer quantity of films classified as 'foreign.' For those reasons and a few others, I would not think that The International Cinema lives us to its claim. Having said that, I Love The International Cinema! I have seen a Spanish, German, English and French film there and enjoyed them all. This past weekend I saw The Legend of 1900 about a boy who spends his entire life on an ocean liner. He never sets foot on land, but he does find out that he is an exceptionally fantastic piano player. Quite strange, but nothing I wouldn't expect from The International Cinema. If you ever want to go, let me know and I will be pleased to translate for you, at least as long as it is in English or Swahili.

11 February 2009

Sleeping, Dreams, Naps, and Chloroform


I don't know what I have been on this week, but my sleep has been very forgetive. Forgetive does not mean forgetful, by the way. A few nights ago I dreamt that I went paintballing with my mother. I would say I can't imagine my mother ever going paintballing, but I guess I can imagine it, since I did. Then I had a dream that I was on the Boston Celtics and that I scored the last few points at a game in Washington. I remember loving the Washington mountains and the rain. The Celtics won the game and my family went nuts. I could dunk, so obviously it was a good dream. Last night I dreamt about a giant man-eating shark (similar to the one above) that my friend was training at a sea park. Unfortunately, the shark ate one of his trainers, but luckily my friend knew what to do. When we got the beast to spit up the trainer, the trainer wasn't the only thing that came up; in addition a large, talking tapeworm with one eye fell out of the shark's mouth. How random is that? I swear my roommate is slipping me chloroform in my sleep... The tapeworm was about the size of a shopvac tube, and he didn't have much of value to say. Enough about my dreams, time to talk about my sleeping habits. The other night I went to bed at 11:00pm, and at 12:00am my roommate came in and turned on the light. I shot right up and thought it was morning. I was so convinced that I had slept through my alarm clock that I started freaking out. My roommate had to calm me down and inform me that he hadn't even gone to bed yet, and that I was not late for anything. It was quite traumatic. On Tuesday I went skiing all afternoon, but came back to school to attend a math colloquium. I was so exhausted I slept right through it. If there was a degree offered for an ability to sleep through a lecture, only to be woken up by the concluding applause, I would have a PhD. After the talk I knew a nap was in my immediate future if I was to be functional. I found a nice bench and took a rest that could only be described as illustrious. When I woke up I was not functional, contrary to my previous intentions. I passed one classmate who called be by name, to which I could only respond with a half-open-eyed "eh." I was a mess. Things were not processing. Anyway, make sure to get lots of sleep and be suspicious if your roommate wheels an oxygen-tank device into your room then sings you to sleep. He's probably up to no good. If you have any interpretations of my dreams, I am open to them.

08 February 2009

#1 Dad


I haven't posted in awhile because I have been very busy with my multi-faceted life. Last week I was a single Dad in Springville, in addition to an athlete who is not dead. My Aunt (pronounced Ont, not ant) and Uncle went to Miami for the week and asked me to watch their four kids while they were gone. I'd say it went pretty well. Besides losing the dog and two of the kids as they chased after the dog, letting the oldest stay out until 2 a.m. on a school day and then letting him stay home from school and Church the rest of the week because he caught a cold while he was out, stepping on the 12 yr. old's violin, and abusing the "two scoops" ice cream rule like it had never even been implemented, the week went by flawlessly. Each morning I got the kids up on time, filled up my "#1 Dad" mug with hot cocoa, and loaded the chillun' into the Honda Pilot and took them to school. After school I helped them with their practicing, which mostly consisted of me asking questions like, "What's rosin?" "Why is your violin shaped like that?" "Can I try playing?" "Why are you still playing Jingle Bells in February?" I am not sure if I was a help or a hindrance, but at least I enjoyed it. The dog (Delta) and the kids were recovered, but only after a 30 minute, 3 block man/dog hunt. As for the ice cream, I just love it. I love it so much I eat it all the time, so I figured the kids could do the same while they were under my care. Well, no one said anything until my Uncle called on the phone, and the 9 yr. old said to him, "Yea! And we are having way more than four scoops!" That's when I learned about the house rule. Oops. When the real parents got back I learned the actual house rule is two scoops. My bad, again. Anyway, my other paternal activities included a 12 yr. old girls' basketball game, wherein I chatted with the other parental units about our "little ones", cooking dinner, taking the kids to my basketball game, and getting beat in Skip-bo and Life. Yea, I got worked. Anyway, it was a fantastic week bonding with my cousins and I can't wait to be the #1 Dad again.
It's my birthday.