Sleeping, Dreams, Naps, and Chloroform

I don't know what I have been on this week, but my sleep has been very forgetive. Forgetive does not mean forgetful, by the way. A few nights ago I dreamt that I went paintballing with my mother. I would say I can't imagine my mother ever going paintballing, but I guess I can imagine it, since I did. Then I had a dream that I was on the Boston Celtics and that I scored the last few points at a game in Washington. I remember loving the Washington mountains and the rain. The Celtics won the game and my family went nuts. I could dunk, so obviously it was a good dream. Last night I dreamt about a giant man-eating shark (similar to the one above) that my friend was training at a sea park. Unfortunately, the shark ate one of his trainers, but luckily my friend knew what to do. When we got the beast to spit up the trainer, the trainer wasn't the only thing that came up; in addition a large, talking tapeworm with one eye fell out of the shark's mouth. How random is that? I swear my roommate is slipping me chloroform in my sleep... The tapeworm was about the size of a shopvac tube, and he didn't have much of value to say. Enough about my dreams, time to talk about my sleeping habits. The other night I went to bed at 11:00pm, and at 12:00am my roommate came in and turned on the light. I shot right up and thought it was morning. I was so convinced that I had slept through my alarm clock that I started freaking out. My roommate had to calm me down and inform me that he hadn't even gone to bed yet, and that I was not late for anything. It was quite traumatic. On Tuesday I went skiing all afternoon, but came back to school to attend a math colloquium. I was so exhausted I slept right through it. If there was a degree offered for an ability to sleep through a lecture, only to be woken up by the concluding applause, I would have a PhD. After the talk I knew a nap was in my immediate future if I was to be functional. I found a nice bench and took a rest that could only be described as illustrious. When I woke up I was not functional, contrary to my previous intentions. I passed one classmate who called be by name, to which I could only respond with a half-open-eyed "eh." I was a mess. Things were not processing. Anyway, make sure to get lots of sleep and be suspicious if your roommate wheels an oxygen-tank device into your room then sings you to sleep. He's probably up to no good. If you have any interpretations of my dreams, I am open to them.