I foolishly went to the library this afternoon by myself, with an hour of nothing on my docket. It was only foolish because Bozo the Clown was there, and I waited in line for 45 minutes to get my balloon dog that looks more like a German U-Boat that it does a Dachshund. It doesn't bark either, which was a bit of a disappointment. However, with my remaining ten minutes (I had to hurry home to roll my quarters, a task that was long overdue) I successfully crammed three digital video discs into the slot to save time filing them in individually, which allowed me a few precious moments to ponder the Utopian concept of libraries.
Allow the recapturing to begin: I concluded today- after six microseconds- that the library has everything I need in life, and all for free nonetheless. For entertainment, there are movies, books, music, and occasionally Bozo the Clown. To stay up with current events there are newspapers, magazines, and often televisions. For food, there is a waterfountain, an address which accommodates deliverymen (unless your library only has a PO box and therefore no address), and a staff fridge which is always stocked full of brown bag lunches (the circulation librarian brings the best sandwiches, or so I've heard on the DL). For sociality, there are plenty of patrons to chat with, and love, as long as you use whispered tones (which could contribute to a friend becoming a lover. Whispered tones always do that. It's amazing more people don't fall in love in the library). For exercise, there are stairs and plenty of encyclopedias to lift. For sleep, there are very comfy chairs in the newspaper room. If you ever doubt that, just ask one of the senior citizens snoozing in one on any given day. Really, the library has everything I need. I love it there, and if you are ever discouraged during Finals week when it's 11:52 and you are still studying away, just remember what brio you could have for the fine institution known as a Book Building. Like America, love it or leave it.