It's Tuesday, which means haircut day! Much, much to my dismay the Bon Lose It Academy of Comedians has gone out of business, leaving me with only twelve billion other hair schools in Provo to choose from. Today it was Paul Mitchell Hair School, which thankfully did not disappoint in the comedy department. I knew it was a good choice when I sat down with Alisa (not concurrently, in fact only I sat down) and she asked me if I wanted a five minute head massage. There are not enough languages in the world to accurately describe how much I agreed with that question. I tried to say yes so quickly (about one hexa-second) that the first thing to come out of my mouth was binary, and I responded with "1." She gave me a weird look, but nothing more odd than I have been receiving ever since I got a picture of Patrick Swayze tattood to my face (R.I.P.). Alisa was cordial and friendly to me, asking me such questions as "Are you picky about your hair?"
Me: "Um, no, not really."
Alisa: "Like, not at all? Good."
That was a little scary. I asked her to buzz my sides with a #2, as I usually do, but for some strange Paul Mitchell reason they are no longer allowed to use buzzers. (At least not on hair- I think they're still allowed for doorbells.) Therefore, my hair did not get cut very short and after an hour I didn't have the time to ask her to go shorter, knowing that she would be doing it all by hand and scissors. I think she cut off about four days worth of hair. When the haircut was done, Alisa brought over her supervisor who did not strike me as much of a cognoscente in the hair cutting world. Evidence: She asked me if an older sibling had whacked me on the head as a child, which she supposed caused the blond spot on the crown of my head. I told her it was a birthmark, but she was less than convinced. Evidence #2: She was short, and couldn't reach my hair, so she asked the student (Alisa) if the chair went down. I would hope that as a supervisor in a salon, she would know that the chairs can in fact higher and lower. The haircut was great, but by far the highlight of my Paul Mitchell episode was the "Movie Day" sign prominently displayed. It was advertising a fundraiser with a movie and time, both to be determined. That made me a little less than willing to buy a ticket. But then I read what the ticket included- "For a $10 ticket you get: *Fun! *A Ticket! *Casual Day! *Hours!" Can you imagine? A ticket includes a ticket, hours, and casual day! What kind of hours does $10 buy? What all does Casual Day include? It sounds intriguing. Then I read the bottom of the marquee, which read, I kid you not, "Tickets go on sell soon!" Oh dear. C'mon Paul Mitchell! I was not as impressed with my haircut as I was with the one Olga gave me last time, but it was still a great excursion. The hair schools live on!
Get pumped for October 1st 2009... It should be better than my haircut.